Monday 

As I walk into Saint Luke’s South to begin shadowing for the week, I feel my stomach twist with dread as I think about having to introduce myself to the nurses in the department without putting my best foot forward. Thankfully, no one screams in fear or spontaneously declares that they need to be taken to the ICU, so I allow myself to relax as I begin my week without makeup.

I have loved makeup ever since I was little, and I used to look forward to the rare dance recital when I’d be allowed to wear a little blush and mascara, but it wasn’t until seventh grade that I began wearing makeup consistently. Ever since then, I have worn makeup to school every day and am rarely spotted without it. A few weeks ago, I watched a Buzzfeed video titled “What It’s Like to Stop Wearing Makeup,” in which a woman who has worn makeup every day for 17 years spent a week without it and documented her thoughts and feelings about the experience. Aside from being a good way to spend three minutes, the video also made me think about my own relationship with makeup, especially in regard to what my reaction would be if I were to suddenly stop wearing it. With that, I decided to test my willpower and carefully crafted self-esteem by going for a week without makeup.

It isn’t until I am done shadowing for the day and am stepping into AP Literature that I remember my bare face and try to duck into the room without being noticed. A few of my tablemates give me odd looks, but seventh hour is the first time anyone says something to me. A classmate declares that it’s “throwing [her] off” that I don’t have my normal winged eyeliner on, and although her comment wasn’t meant in a cruel way, I can’t stop hearing her words bounce around in my head all day because they remind me of the harsh perspectives that are displayed in regard to makeup, whether one chooses to wear it or not.

“We shouldn’t display such harshness toward those who do or do not wear makeup,” senior Emily Dixon said. “Saying, ‘Oh, she painted her face today,’ or ‘Oh, her face looks naked’ or other things like that can be really harmful to hear.”

I’ve been told before that I wear too much makeup, but it isn’t often that I hear I wear too little. With that in mind, I grit my teeth and prepare myself for what could end up being a very long week.

Tuesday

I roll out of bed feeling as groggy as ever as I get ready for the day. For the second morning in a row, the makeup lined up on my bathroom counter sits untouched, though I wish desperately for a little concealer to cover up the shadows under my eyes. I glance in the mirror one last time and briefly consider giving up my quest, but thanks to my newly shortened morning routine, I slept in for an additional 15 minutes and don’t have the time. I feel a little more vulnerable as I go through my day, especially after a friend looks at me and asks if I’m feeling all right because I “look more tired than usual today,” which is certainly not the most encouraging thing I’ve heard this week.

Not to worry though, I catch up on my sleep by taking a quick power nap after school and discover that one of the benefits to going without makeup is that I don’t wake up with raccoon eyes. I guess it’s the little things that count.

Wednesday

Did I choose to wear a sweatshirt to school because it’s a Wednesday and I’m feeling lazy, or because I needed a drab outfit to match my drab face? I guess the world will never know. When I go to babysit after school, I wonder how the fourth grade girl will react to the fact that I no longer have my “wings” as she has so affectionately dubbed them. A good thing about elementary schoolers is that their opinions are uncorrupted, so when she fails to mention my bare face, I hope it’s a good sign and that she can look up to me for not always looking like I’ve stepped off the pages of a magazine.

“Now that my seven-year-old Reese has started asking about wearing makeup, I tell her that she’s too young and that when she gets older we’ll talk about it,” gifted education teacher Jana Tobin said. “I really do stop and think about how I’m modeling and what kind of example I’m setting. What I try to promote with Reese is that Mommy wears makeup to work out of habit and because it’s comfortable for me because that’s a habit I started as a teenager, but that on the weekends, I’m also very comfortable going without makeup.”

Tobin says that although she began wearing makeup during middle school, there was “never a big fuss about it,” nor did she receive external pressure from her mother to wear makeup “correctly.” However, there are many new outside influences that encourage young women to wear makeup, even at relatively early ages.

“One interesting experience that I had with Reese is that she participated in a dance competition when she was probably five, and we were told that we needed to put makeup on her,” Tobin said. “I had to call a friend and say, ‘Do we really put makeup on them?’ So I did because that was part of the expectation for the show, but I reconciled it with the fact that it was just one performance and I only put the makeup on her that I was comfortable with her wearing.”

Thursday

For the first day this week, I don’t actually mind going without makeup. I don’t think I necessarily look great, but I’ve gotten used to my bare face. I still feel like I’ve been putting a lot of work into my appearance, just in a different way. I’ve been eating healthier foods, drinking more water, getting more sleep and actually following my skincare routine, and dare I say it, it seems to be working, so that could be an additional factor contributing to my confidence boost. I’m glad that I’m gaining confidence in my natural appearance, because I know that this isn’t something I would have had the courage to do even just a year ago. This makes me have a newfound respect for those who have always been self-assured enough to consistently go without makeup.

“I’ve always felt good about myself despite the fact that I don’t wear makeup,” Dixon said. “I’ve always just had a positive attitude toward life rather than material objects, which helps. If you find in yourself that you like your image without [makeup], you might feel better in regards to your self-esteem. I don’t think [makeup is] necessary to feel confident.”

Friday

It’s a Friday off from school, and if I really wanted to, I could have easily put makeup on this morning, but I figure I’ve come this far, so what’s the point in giving up now? I go out of town for a forensics tournament in Emporia, and I’m actually very glad that I’m not competing until tomorrow, after my week is up, because I’m not sure that I would have felt comfortable competing dressed up in formal attire but without any makeup. In that respect, I’ve come to appreciate the use of makeup for special occasions, instead of trying to constantly look perfect, which is entirely unrealistic.

“I think that our culture, because of the images we see on magazines, TV and internet sites with Photoshopping and all that they do — I think that in itself creates some pressure on our young girls,” Tobin said. “I am concerned about that for my own daughter because I don’t want her to think that’s how the world really is because it’s not.”

Saturday

Not only is it my first day in a week that I’m putting on makeup, but I’m doing so while at a hotel, hoping that my skin isn’t as sickly green as the fluorescent lighting would suggest. I hold my breath as I do my eyeliner, almost as if I’m afraid that I’ve forgotten the skills I’ve been practicing for the past six years. When it’s all said and done, I don’t look like a toddler doodled on my face, which is all I can truly hope for. For about 10 minutes, I feel strange and wonder why my eyelashes feel heavier than usual, but then I realize something: I am the exact same person without makeup as I am with makeup.

“What I hope for my daughter is that she will grow up knowing that she can use makeup if she wants to, but not because somebody else expects that of her, and not because she needs it,” Tobin said. “I talk to her often about how what matters the most is who she is inside.”

I’ve always thought that playing around with makeup is a great way to have a quick confidence boost, but over the years I may have forgotten that having cherry red lips is not my best quality, especially not in comparison to my compassion, empathy and wit. If I’ve learned one thing this week, it’s that makeup should be embraced, but not hidden behind. If you want to wear makeup, that’s great, but if not, that’s entirely your prerogative as well. In a time when there are countless influences pressuring young women to wear makeup, whether it’s from media sources or peers, it’s important to remember that appearance isn’t a defining factor in character. Beauty can be seen both with and without makeup, because our best qualities, the ones that make us admired by loved ones, can’t be washed away or covered up.

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Monday- "I’ve been told before that I wear too much makeup, but it isn’t often that I hear I wear too little. "